Bah Humbug

I think I am becoming a bit neurotic... It's about that time anyway. People are beginning to get on my last nerve. I think that I am just beginning to interact with more people on different levels and I am pouring more energy into dealing with these relationships rather than trying to keep my head above water as a dialysis patient. People think that because I have had a transplant that things can go back to being the way they were before I began dialysis. But they don't understand that I have to get used to the emotions attached to reciving the transplant, having another person's organ in my body, taking 26 pills every single day, and the changes that occur after the surgery. I mean my life literally consisted of dialysis three days a week for approximately two years. Now people think that I can and want to deal with the crap that is going on in their lives (ok well it isn't crap). I do not get paid to listen to people rant and rave about the things going on in their lives. That is the main reason that I write. I think part of it is that I have pretty much been the reliable sibling, friend, cousin for so long, that people automatically expected me to just melt back into the role. But having gone through everything that I have gone through, there is no way that I'm gonna be that person again. Maybe I am just being a little mean... ok I know I am being a little mean, but I am tired of people always depending on me. My therapist told me to take a trip (preferably out of state) to get away from everyone, but I don't really have anywhere to go. I think I'll just go and hide for a while and not tell anyone where I am... i think my mental health needs a long break!